I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize