Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Randomize
