If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
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the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
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This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
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