I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize