i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
