Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i dont even know how to be here
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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