it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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