I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
