I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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