i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
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Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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