i don't like sucking hair
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
...so i touched it.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
