we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
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