Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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