Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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