Don't you send me to vm
wakey wakey hands off snakey
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize
