so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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