oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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