i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
