I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
