Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
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