I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
