This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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