It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
How did I end up in the pool?!
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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