I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
