Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
