oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Randomize
