can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
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