I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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