oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
