this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize