what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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