Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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