The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
