But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
