im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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