After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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