You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
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