I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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