Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
