She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
