he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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