I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
