Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
