READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
