If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
