I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
