super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
