I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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