there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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