i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
