a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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